Favorite/least favorite parts, if any?
Emotion word examples: interested, intrigued, curious, perplexed, angry, anxious, fearful, optimistic, pleased, outraged, annoyed, amused, surprised, bored, playful, comfortable, sympathetic, warm, irritated, suspicious, worried, etc.
Your impression of Zayne, his master, Garret, and their relationship? Other characters in this section include: Sal, Lyssa, Merchant, and Herbie.
You don't need to address every scene if you don't feel it's necessary. If you want to, that's wonderful. However, if you just want to focus on those that worked particularly well for you (or those that didn't), that's fine too. Here's a little memory jog of what happened: End of bath scene, Master goes beasty on the merchant, buying shoes, Zayne tells Sal everything, Zayne's nightmares/Master tea and joining him in bed, set up with Lyssa, Master tears up the library, Master leaves on his trip, Zayne cleans library, masturbates, plays piano, and meets with Sal, letter to Ronos, library surprise, Zayne suggests Herbie sign up for riding lessons, Zayne plays "their" song, bed together, teaching letters, braiding hair, Sal visits, Master upset, reads to Zayne, bed together, announcement about the Saggart mission.
Natural/Unnatural? Any favorite lines? Any that you disliked or thought were out of place?
Is there enough description for you throughout? Too much or too little anywhere?
